Karen Keller
Women and stress go hand in hand. Stress exists in the wake of tough economic times, questionable outcomes and changing definitions of success.
If there are no peaks of stress in your life then it may be a sign that you aren’t achieving all that you are capable of because you’ve become too entrenched in your comfort zone. You aren’t out their grabbing opportunities that come your way. Putting yourself out there, taking a risk, pushing the limits is stressful, but it’s a good positive stress. It leads to a release of endorphins making you feel good and accomplished.
Things change in life for women. You start to consider your personal and professional life from another perspective once you reach a certain age. Things that used to be important, (or you thought were because everyone else thought so), really aren’t. You no longer want to continue in the rat race to the top or look (and act) like you did in college.
But stress is still in your life, even though you have accomplished great things. This stress is different. It takes on a special meaning for you. It makes you ask yourself new questions and desiring extraordinary results.
There are 3 main stressors that a wise woman welcomes into her life. They make her take notice, learn and experience because she understands their value to her.
- Family. Younger women tend to stress over family issues like having children, raising children, making sure they turn into good responsible adults, etc. They worry about being the ‘perfect’ mom and wife. Younger women place a certain amount of self-worth in how they keep their home. They pay attention to what everyone else may see. This is part of the process of becoming a woman.
When a woman reaches a certain age, she begins to focus on the relationships she has in her family; her spouse, her kids, her mother and herself. She is looking back and asking if she really got what she needed from those relationships. She does an inventory of how she contributed to those relationships. Was she real? She looks at who she has become and takes that into her relationships, looking at what she want to change to have a more satisfying relationship.
- Future. Younger women focus on getting ahead at work, climbing the corporate ladder, or where they will be in 10 years in their professional lives. They measure success in terms of promotion or ability to purchase.
While the wise woman thinks of her financial future in a much different way. She is concerned about security and freedom to live a life and lifestyle she chooses. Freedom is important because the wise woman knows what it means, emotionally and for her sense of self to be independent, to make choices based on what she wants not what she can afford.
- Weight. Yes, this ugly monster is still an issue. Younger women obsess over baby weight gain or dressing for other women because of competition. They tend to judge themselves harshly because of what the magazines say you should look like. Remember, they are still chasing the corporate ladder.
The wise woman sees her weight in relation to how she feels, her energy, her motivation and her mindset. It’s all about her but in a way where she is being selfish to care for, not starve, her needs. At this point in life the wise woman knows that heading into the next stage with a healthy mind, body and spirit is essential for total grace and satisfaction.
Wouldn’t it be great if the younger woman knew what the wise woman could teach? She could start earlier to develop a deeper appreciation and knowledge about these three stressors which will come sooner or later. The wise woman would say, “Don’t worry so much. It will all come together.”
